MOTHER

Paul? 

(DAD puts his paper down immediately. He has been well trained by MOTHER to listen to her when she speaks). 

DAD

Yes, dear?  

TOM

That's training!   

MOTHER

(to TOM) Do you want to leave the room? (TOM shakes his head "No") Then behave yourself.  

DAD

Yes, dear? You wanted me?  

MOTHER

No, Paul. Fred wanted to talk to you.  

DAD

Oh, that... (he starts reading the newspaper again)  

FRED

(turns back to MOTHER) You see! That! He refers to me as “that"!  

MOTHER

Don't get so upset. He's tired.  Paul?  

DAD

(paper down) Yes, dear?

MOTHER

(signaling FRED to go to DAD) Now, go ahead.  

FRED

Dad, may I ...  

DAD

No.  

FRED

Wait. (to MOTHER) You see?  

MOTHER

(to FRED) What was it you wanted to talk to him about?

DAD

He wants to use the car. 

MOTHER

(to DAD) Well, why can't he?  

DAD

It's Wednesday.

MOTHER

Yes, it's Wednesday.  

DOT

You don't need a calendar in this house. You just ask Dad for the car, and he tells you what day it is.  

MOTHER

Dorothy, that's not nice.  

DOT

Well, it's true. Yesterday I asked and he said, "No, it's Tuesday."   

DAD

You know the rules.   

FRED

Yes, we know the rules.  

DOT

Do we ever!

FRED

Weekends only.  

TOM

Yes, you may only use the car on weekends.  

DOT

Friday, Saturday, and Sunday afternoon.  

DAD

Right.  

MOTHER

(to FRED) What did you want the car for?  

DAD

I said "No".

MOTHER

(to DAD) Now, don't be so harsh. Maybe there's a special reason for him needing the car.  

DAD

A rule's a rule.

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